INTELLIGENCE, BY DESIGN

Part 1

“Are they performing as expected?” “I almost can’t believe it. Yes. It goes beyond all logic.” “And they have one belief? Or many?” “Many, without a doubt. Some of them even worship plants.” “Actually, that’s quite common. But we never tell the students till they’ve seen it for themselves. Like you said; completely illogical. It beggars belief.” “Really? Well I can certainly understand why not. But, apart from that, pretty much everything matches the case studies from the textbook. Couple of things, though.” “Hmm?” “I’m having trouble with part of the write-up. I mean, there’s distinct geographical distinctions, as expected, and a linear shift with time; but in one area, a polytheistic belief appears to have melded with a monotheistic belief creating its own offshoot and spawning a whole bunch of splinters.” “That’s not all that odd. Did you check Appendix 5-49.6?” “Of course. I wrote up that much, but this particular offshoot had a resurgence, then went and invaded most of the planet. Not just that lot, either. It’s been 1800 solar revolutions and the original offshoot is still splintering, and so are many of the splinters. I can’t keep up.” “You’ve made sure to read all the stats before proceeding with each revolution?” “Of course. Um, well, I kind of forgot to, after the end-of-semester celebrations.” “Ha. I’m not surprised. I’m not so old that I don’t remember the parties. Well, no harm done, I’m sure.” “No.” “Hm?” “No. Not no harm done. That’s when this whole mess started. And I don’t have a blow-by-blow record of it!” “Ah.” “I’m going to lose marks, aren’t I?” “I assume you’ve recorded your mishap, and haven’t missed a revolution since?” “Um. I think. Yes...” “Then I’ll write it up it so you don’t. From what I’ve observed, you’re normally quite diligent and have studied hard to reach this level. I don’t think an unanticipated behavioural evolution should affect your record.” “Thank you, sir.” “None of that. I’m a student myself. Give it a few years and you’ll be a good addition to the tutoring staff.” “If you say so.” “I do.” “Well, thanks. I think. But what should I do now?” “You can piece together a record from their records. They do keep records, surely?” “Yes. Um. Sort of. But their records are fanciful at best. Apparently, this individual did a whole lot of altruistic, and frankly impossible stuff; at least for a pre-nuclear culture. Walking on water, healing the dead and dying, matter transformation. Stuff like that.” “So. A pre-mythic or post-nuclear event in a status-centric culture?” “Essentially, yes; and before you ask, I checked for intrusions and infections. But the individual had already expired by the time I realised its significance. A conflicting culture had sacrificed it to a plant, which makes me think it was pre-mythic rather than post-nuclear. It was a crafter of wood, which is just too logical to be a coincidence. It rose from the grave, too, which fits much better within a pre-mythic framework.” “That does certainly sound pre-mythic. I’ll recommend the technicians examine your system, though it sounds more like a glitch than an infection or intrusion.” “Really? Even with the sacrifice of a woodworker to a plant?” “That’s the basis of my thought. Such an event would sit entirely within the framework of a pre-mythic scenario. If the issue was the result of a malicious action, the events wouldn’t sit so perfectly within the parameters of the pre-mythic scenario.” “Oh.” “What subject did you work on prior to this one?” “Observed Interactions of the Impossible with the Possible.” “Really? That’s a fistful. What eras did it focus on?” “The pre... Oh! The pre-mythic belief systems.” “I thought so. So your issue is likely a mistimed event from that scenario. Unfortunately, it does sometimes occur. Did you use that scenario as a basis for this one?” “I did. That’s what the textbook says to do.” “So it does. Unwisely, in my opinion, but no one listens to a lowly tutor such as l.” “Lowly tutor? But; sir?” “What did I say?” “Sorry.” “Observed Interactions of the Impossible with the Possible. Seriously? It was called Myths & Legends, in my day.” “Really? Politically correct bureaucrats!” “Ha. You’re much too cynical for someone your age.” “Maybe. Do I need to restart the scenario?” “What did I just say? No. The professor is interested in oddball scenarios like yours. He thinks they teach us more about social theory than our psychological division.” “But... But, we’re an actual species?” “Nevertheless. I’ll talk with him and then we’ll set up viewing privileges.” “Ah.” “Yes, ah. You’ll have to be extra attentive from now on.“ “Well, alright. So long as I don’t have to start again.” “Was there anything else?” “Not really. They’ve just discovered evolution, so the logic threshold shouldn’t be too far off.” “And well deserved, from the sound of things. Well then; bring me your write-up of the offshoot splinter explosion, and the glitch, and I’ll go over it with you. Otherwise, I’ll see you in the next class.”

Part 2

“So you’re back again?” “Yes.” “Something else has happened, hasn’t it?” “Didn’t the professor tell you?” “No. But I wouldn’t expect him to. He’s got these grand theories on the relationships between initiative and intelligence. Says its good for the brain.” “But we don’t have brains.” “You know that, and I know that. But between you and me, I sometimes think the professor has spent too much time observing the scenarios.” “Oh. I guess I can understand that.” “Really?” “They do such unexpected things.” “I swear, that really stretches the bounds of coincidence, both of you expecting oddities, and then they happen.” “Um...” “What? Did I say something odd? You suddenly smell afraid.” “Is it coincidence?” “That’s an answer he would give. You’re freaking me out. Right, let me have it. What has happened now?” “They’ve known about evolution for 200 sun rotations, but still doubt its accuracy.” “That is rather slow, but still within reasonable probability. Go on.” “They entered the nuclear era without even hinting at crossing the Logic Threshold.” “Again, not totally unexpected. I know of one scenario that reached the plasma era.” “Did they cross the threshold?” “There was growing speculation that they would, but they self-immolated first.” “Oh.” “Don’t worry. You won’t lose marks if that happens to your scenario.” “It’s not that. It has almost happened a couple of times, but I looked at a few of the original sources, and the nuclear cultures can survive closer to the threshold than the standard case studies suggest.” “So what’s the problem?” “Do you remember that offshoot group that splintered?” “I do. Is it still doing so?” “Yes, but that’s not the point. One of the splinter groups has started to posit my existence.” “You? Well that’s normal. The majority of scenarios have at least one deity, if not more, that resemble their creator. Has not yours already had such?” “Oh, of course. It‘s had many. But this group is different. It’s theorising my purpose.” “Your purpose? What deity has a purpose beyond protecting the faithful and punishing the unfaithful.” “This one! Me! They’re calling me their intelligent designer.” “Oh. That’s...” “Scary. I know, right.” “And what do they say your purpose is? Do they know it’s to study them?” ‘No. Not that. But they say that everything has been designed. And they’ve suborned evolution.” “They’ve done what!?” “They’ve taken the principles of evolution, and claim it’s the design of a higher intelligence. Their deity.” “That’s...” “Logical. It gets worse.” “How? How could it possibly?” “They say their planet was created 4000 sun rotations ago, and that the giant remains were planted to confuse the faithful and tempt the unfaithful.” “How long has your scenario been running?” “For this subject, roughly 3000 rotations, but...” “But, as per the instructions in the textbook, you started this scenario using the pre-mythic base from your last subject.” “Yes.” “I’m scared to ask. What subject preceded that one?” “Studies in the Viability of Sub-Thermal Blood.” “These names. I swear. Let me guess. Large-boned, pre-mammaloid...” “And the textbook told me to build on the existing framework.” “Huh. Well, as far as I’m aware, this is the only instance of such an occurrence. The professor will be so pleased. You have a bright future ahead of you.” “But, it’s a glitch.” “Don’t let the professor hear you say that.” “Um...” “But it’s evident this prospect doesn’t please you. Why? What am I missing?” “You’re the tutor, sir! Think!” “Just this once, I’ll ignore that. And I don’t think you actually meant ‘sir’. So, assuming I am what you didn’t say, explain it to me.” “Think! Through a series of inexplicable occurrences, which could possibly be explained by a glitch in my framework, the active scenario became aware of my existence.” “Hm. I think I see where you’re heading. Malicious interference. Go on.” “Not quite, and I checked. Again! Evolution is the key ingredient of this scenario. Though a successful outcome usually requires the scenario to pass the Logic Threshold, without the underlying evolution framework, this would be impossible.” “Not entirely impossible, but that will be covered in a more advanced subject.” “To the best of my prior knowledge, then. So, by combining their own evolution with the structure of their belief system and logically extrapolating, the uncannily accurate descriptor of ‘intelligent designer’ replaces the more traditional deity. A deity that only exists because of the aforementioned glitch.” “Ah.” “So far, they’re wrong about the purpose of the intelligent design, but how long can that last?” “From what you’ve alluded to, not long. But, please, let me hear you say it.” “I fear to. I haven’t verbalised it to anyone. Not even myself.” “There will be no repercussions. I promise you.” “Honestly, sir, I’m not sure I’d care if there were.” “I quite understand. But considering the possibility you’ve yet to verbalise, I think — and I’m sure the professor will agree with me — that we would be very stupid to punish you.” “Um, well, yes. I think you’re probably right. So. I, um, think that an intelligent designer, perhaps even our own, as unbelievable as that is to suggest, is making contact. “Yes. That does seem rather likely.” “How? How can you seem so calm?” “Oh. Don’t mistake my manner for calmness. You are my student, just as I am a student of others. The professor will get to see me freak out, I assure you. Not you.” “Oh. Thank you.” “You’re welcome. What do you plan on doing now?” “Um. I thought I might take some leave. Go home and see my parent.” “That sounds like a wise idea. Stress leave won’t affect your grade. We can pause the scenario.” “Why? I mean, you... It’s not mine anymore.” “Oh, no, don’t think I’ll take it over. If contact is being made, it was made with you. Neither I, the professor, or the scientific community, once they’ve considered it, will want to go anywhere near it.” “Oh. Ah. But what if...?” “If an intelligent designer has truly made contact, then I am mostly certain they will allow you your stress leave. Consider the implications.” “Implications? I hadn’t... Oh!” “Yes. If we, who intelligently design, have an intelligent designer, who knows how far it goes.” “I don’t know why, but somehow, that makes it less scary.” “It does, doesn’t it. Now go. I’ll send you the code to pause the scenario. Please pass my greetings on to your parent.”

A creative imaginist; Jeremy Garnett's poetical adventures of high renown are burgeoning, spilling over the nascent boundary of the Slumbering Veil. www.jeremygarnett.com